Understand

Just a short pontification I wrote back in February , thought I would share.

Understand

Imagine an understanding of all things.
Believe in harmony.
Trust in the process.
Agree to disagree.
Let go of the power struggle.
Easier said than done.
This does not in fact make us powerless. It's just not necessary to struggle until you've lost all energy and hope that the outcome will be what you expected. Expectations lead to disappointment when we begin without the willingness to compromise nor the humility to accept an alternate outcome. Our way or no way IS no way.
Breathe think live love and be the responsible kind generous genuine person you are. When confronted with control,anger,violent responses, choose not to participate. Let it go. To continue in the chaos and believe that you will come out to be the 'winner' is just setting ourselves up to be in a lose lose situation, you may have won the battle but at what expense? Crushed feelings, broken hearts, bruised souls. But at least you won....Right?

Half in shadow,half in light

While gazing at the moon this evening I was inspired to complete a piece I've been working for some time now. I rarely if ever write of my childhood/early adulthood as it is a place I do not ever care to be in, never ever again...

I tried to tell you but you didn't hear.
My cries were loud and full of fear.
I tried to show you but you didn't see.
The years of pain and agony.
My soul they were breaking.
Multiplicity in the making.
A pattern,and trend.
Always safety around the bend.
I cannot reach it because you cannot hear.
You cannot see.
The tangled mess is inside of me.
One strike two strikes floor.
Three strikes four strikes more.
Just stay still, doesn't work.
Run away, doesn't work.
Fight back, it only gets worse.
Beaten, tattered, torn.
I divide.
A body of want,and need. I want unconditional love,acceptance,praise. I need safety.
Then there is the body of get.
The body of want and need join in harmony and lay in wait.
The body of get becomes a shell.
Doomed to face eternal hell.
Which will win this horrifying fight?
Not again. Not another night.
The boards,the belts,the fists,the guns. The bruises,bumps, and broken bones. No no not again,I cannot last another fight. At last I break free. I must flee. As I realize it's either him or me. One will not wake to see the dawn if I stay. Bitter sweet. At an awful,unbearable price. I break out of the body of get,and become the body of want and need. Which I must now feed so it may flourish and become whole again so I may regain what I painstakingly,heartbreakingly had to leave behind. One day I will be whole again, one day.

Liars

Liars
Liars,cheats,thieves.
The world does contain these.
They sneak creep ooze their way

through each and every day.

Finding weak spots, slipping in.
So they may commit their sins.
Crimes of opportunity they commit.
Let them in.
They'll do their bit...
And then some.
Liars,cheats,thieves.
A heartless bunch of fools are these.
What's yours belongs to them you know.
It's not just possessions they seek.
Your heart, soul and innocence they'll keep.
The boogeyman is coming, you'll see.
A wolf in sheep's clothing he'll be.
Watch out cuz he's coming to getcha...

Romance?

Romance? Clasp my hand and let's glide together as we dance this sweet romance. Look into my eyes,deep into my soul with wanting. Sweep my hair from my face and whisper in my ear as we dance this sweet romance. Closer than we've ever been before. Our lips meet as you lift me off the floor. Passion rises to the surface from the core as we dance this sweet romance.  Round and round we spin. You carry me from within to places I've never been as we dance this sweet romance. I feel safe inside your arms forever more as we dance this sweet romance.

Beautiful Agony

Beautiful agony Hanging on by a thread. The memories of you swirling through my head. A song makes my breath catch in my throat. My eyes begin to well with tears. Raw emotion. Hanging on by a thread. My inside comes to the surface. The beautiful memories. The painful agony. Still unbelievable after all these years. That you are there, Stars moon and sky. And we are here, Earth sand and ocean tide. Somedays just hanging on by a thread.

Introverted

Antisocial  Angry Rageful Vengeful Determined Tare myself to shreds Piece myself back together Am I whole now? Some of the pieces don't fit Should they  I don't know Reach out  Breathe Be Peace.

Chameleon

A chameleon A marionette I am my father's daughter My brother's sister My husband's wife My children's mom My teams manager My managers employee I am a friend I am a peer I am a mentor I am a mentee But where in this is me? I blend with the scenery I become whatever you want me to be. Where am I in all this? What is my purpose? Who am I truly? Soul searching is treacherous Self defeating? Sometimes. Demoralizing? Sometimes. Beautiful? Some times. Fear breeds fear Anxiety breeds anxiety Anger. Breeds. Anger. Look for the good, hang on to it Look for the bad, fix it Find a true friend to discover share and grow with, Then. I. Might. Find. Me.